The Initiate
As we say in the traditions, “Emotions don’t think!”
As Kem, we work daily to build, maintain, and protect our purity so that we can reach our goal of recreating the Divine world. Therefore, we practice the control of self to make decisions that will move us closer to our goal. The control of emotions is especially important because we know the evil and corruption that can accompany them. Living in America makes this practice extremely difficult because this place has a different goal. The modern world has no room for purity, as its goal is to obtain power and control, - requiring an aspect of corruption to get ahead. In this system, the modern society knows the power of controlling an individual's emotion and the illogical actions birthed from the myriad of emotional possibilities. As we say in the traditions, “Emotions don’t think!”
Is there a better way to control a nation, than to render the individuals within it unable to make logical decisions? This lack of rationality leaves us all vulnerable to our own self-destruction.
The modern society invests a ton of energy into the individual's ability to self-destruct. One way of doing this is by using our perception of self, or lack of self-perception. The Roman's understood this as evident by the quote from Julius Caesar “The greatest enemy will hide in the last place you would ever look.”
Modern society has taught us to rely heavily on what others tell us about ourselves. I've fallen victim to this on micro and macro levels. Society tells me that being a black male means that I'm physically gifted but mentally incapable, and that I must fight for the plight of all men who look like me. I've internalized this to perceive myself as one who will stand up for black human rights. Therefore, when police kill a black person and walk away free, I'm supposed to be upset! I'm supposed to stop what I'm doing and fight, protest or whatever.
By first asking myself, “What emotion am I feeling and where is it coming from?”, “What do I need to detach from to not have the same emotional reaction?”
Growing in my spiritual journey, I've acquired the knowledge necessary to stop the progression of evil. By first asking myself, “What emotion am I feeling and where is it coming from?”, “What do I need to detach from to not have the same emotional reaction?” (in addition to seeking out feedback from other Kem people), helps me reshape the perception of myself to one that reflects the values that I seek to stand on.
Until initiation I was an African American, southern male. Independent, educated, and successful. There are many experiences that inform and shape this perspective; the values and goals of my family, friends, school, church, 30+ years of life experience, media, etc. When we cannot see ourselves, we rely on these surroundings to shape our perception of self and provide guidance toward a shared modern societal goal of being at the top. My parents worked hard to afford me the opportunities they didn't have, -which for them meant to do more, differently. Find something you love to do and do it, -whatever you want to be. One fundamental belief associated with this goal is that; you won't make it because of what you know but rather who you know. I lived to make others happy because I thought that I needed other people's favor more than that of my Ancestors or Divine beings. Therefore, I move through life looking for others' reactions to me as if everything is based around me. This is where I externalize my enemy instead of searching within myself. There is nothing wrong with me because I'm special (my self-selected community tells me so). The problem lies within everyone else that doesn't understand how special I am. In short, the world revolves around me, which creates a very dangerous dynamic. I can justify any of my actions, especially towards others. I'm mad at you because you obviously didn't know where I was going, because if you did, you would not have got in front of me but would have got behind me. I'm not mad because I feel entitled to the space in front of me, it is because you are violating my expectations. One can begin to see where this small moment of awareness can drastically change an outcome. On one end, I could approach the person and make a case for why they “disrespected” me possibly leading to confrontation, which typically leads to the transference of evil. On the other end, I could ask myself why do I feel so important? Why do I think that this person, or anyone is making all of their decisions based on their knowledge of me? Which of these does not transfer my negative thoughts and feelings to someone else?
“On the other end, I could ask myself why do I feel so important? Why do I think that this person, or anyone is making all of their decisions based on their knowledge of me? Which of these does not transfer my negative thoughts and feelings to someone else?”
This is the daily battle. The battle that modern society has understood and is winning. Constantly, it seems as if we are exposed to the perceptions of external enemies portrayed to us through education and media. Very rarely is the individual asked to interrogate deep inside themselves and come to the reality of the fact that the war between evil/corruption and goodness/purity is inside each and every one of us. As Kem, we understand this fact and work daily to fight this war. Always fighting the urge to externalize the war to issues outside of ourselves, because when we do, our path to self-destruction has been set. If you’re not putting the time and effort into your own spirit, nobody else will.