The Enemy Within
IN THE MODERN SOCIETY, we are never encouraged to look within ourselves for the source of our own problems. Instead, our minds are saturated with images of external dangers and threats. These threats, both within our homes and across the world, both smaller than we can see and larger than we can understand, both real and imagined... all of these threats are seen as coming from outside of ourselves. We learn about the potential danger coming from terrorists plotting from overseas to take away our freedom. We learn about the man across town who was murdered by his own wife. We are warned about the heartless Republicans who are selling the country to private corporations. We are told about the foolish Democrats who are subsidizing the lazy, uneducated poor with taxpayer dollars. We hear about the Blacks, the Whites, the Mexicans... we learn about all the evils of man that we should seek to protect ourselves from. We, the good; we, the free; we, the ones favored by God must protect ourselves from the evils of humanity at all costs. At least, this is what we are taught...
How interesting that, whoever we are, we think that whenever we are in a dispute, we are the ones on the right side of God, on the right side of the law, or just right, while the ones we are fighting feel the same way. How can we be convinced that we are right when someone else is just as sure that we are wrong? If we can admit that someone else can be wrong, then we, who are just as human, are just as capable of being wrong! If we can be wrong, if we can see that the wrongs of individuals lead to suffering, destruction and evil in the world, then we should have the honesty to seek out ways of becoming better people so that we are not the ones bringing evil to our world. This idea should seem like simple, common sense, but to underestimate the challenge that it presents to each one of us is to underestimate how vulnerable every human being is to the forces of evil.
Each one of us has the desire to think that we are good. We want to think that our goodness should be recognized by the world around us. We think that our goodness has earned us the respect, the consideration of everyone around us. We have trouble believing why someone would disagree with us. Clues that we are not as important as we like to believe hit us in the face every day, but we always resist humbling ourselves to the facts. The fact is that each one of us is only one human out of billions, that humanity is only one species out of billions on Earth, which is only one celestial body out of maybe billions in the galaxy, which is only one galaxy out of maybe billions of.... well let’s just say the universe is vast, more vast than we could ever imagine. Yet we have the arrogance to support war and oppression to force our version of what’s right and good on other people.
The life of an ant is not significant to us. We step on them and kill them without even knowing or caring. We have no way of knowing what is in the mind of that ant; it’s values, opinions, religion, political views, accomplishments or loved ones. I don’t think we ever stop to question that. Maybe it’s because the ant is so much smaller than us. What’s in the mind of an ant is the business of ants and not the business of humans. However, when they invade our houses, it becomes a problem that many of us deal with harshly. Maybe the universe looks at us the same way. Maybe the results of our actions is the only thing worth taking into consideration. If we are lying, cheating, stealing, killing, arguing, regardless of the reason, the results are the same.
We should admit that each one of us does evil because none of us are perfect. We should accept the fact that there is no excuse for the evil we do because our excuses don’t change the results. If we can admit these things, then the next step is to guard ourselves constantly to make sure we are not doing evil, or even thinking about it. It seems so simple. But then why is it so hard for us? Why is it so easy for us to spend our whole lives in denial of these facts without ever questioning? It would seem that all the enemies we are looking for outside of ourselves, in our families, communities, societies, and nature are only distractions from the enemy each one of us has within ourselves. I said, the enemy each one of us has within ourselves.
How is it that we can become enemies to ourselves? If we see our enemy as one who is destroying us, it should quickly become clear. Look at how we destroy ourselves just with the food we eat. The modern health epidemics of diabetes, heart disease and cancer are all the result of dangers that we expose ourselves to, often knowingly. We know that when someone is killed, it’s not the weapon that is judged. Let’s accept responsibility for our own problems. When assessing our lives, usually we can find some decisions we have made to bring suffering upon ourselves unnecessarily. We should then see that when we have made a bad decision, we usually think we are gaining something from it, even while we are facing the consequences. We can see that in the case of the liar, the glutton, the drug addict, the abusive parent or spouse. No matter how much damage we do to our health, no matter how many people we hurt and chase out of our lives, we feel justified and we are more likely to blame someone else when it’s time to face the consequences than to admit that we are our own worst enemy.
It’s your enemy who will distract you from the destruction it is causing in your life, so that it can finish the job of destroying you. Your enemy will find an excuse for everything that it is doing to harm you. Your enemy will use your desires and emotions against you to trick you into letting your guard down and making bad decisions. Your enemy will instigate a fight between you and your neighbor so that it can weaken and defeat you both. Your enemy will convince you that you are moving in the right direction when you are headed straight for a cliff and then make sure to push you when you get to the edge before you can turn around.
How do we fight an enemy so close to us that we think it is part of ourselves? We have to first understand that what we love, what we hate, what we do, what we don’t do, our personalities, our habits, none of these things make us who we are. Then we have the ability to change or eliminate our attitudes, habits and relationships that have proven to be destructive in our lives. It is only our emotions that make us resist change but it is these emotions that serve as the rope to tie our hands and the noose that we hang ourselves with. What I am saying is simple, we should have the honesty to learn from our mistakes and the courage to face the challenge of making sure not to repeat them.
We are writing our own history. Everything we do, even the thoughts we have, cannot be taken back. They will echo out into the universe and affect everything. Ultimately, we will be held accountable for our history. For the human being concerned with their future, protecting our history becomes more important than satisfying our emotions and desires.
There is a Kemetic proverb that states, "A useless task is best left to a dog and even when the dog realizes it’s useless, it will leave it alone." We humans pride ourselves on our ability to think, but unfortunately we do not always use it.